A Witch’s Kitchen Read online

  “Thanks, Grumpkin,” called the bushes in Max’s voice. He cautiously peeped out between branches, hat in his hands.

  “Max!” Millie cried. “I’m so glad you’re here! Cretacia didn’t snitch on you?”

  “Shhhh!” Max said. “No, she didn’t. I have no idea why not. She’s grounded right now, stuck in her room under ward. But Hepsibat and Mother are coming to talk to the Headmistress, so I need your assistance to get me into school.”

  “Oh, no,” Millie told him. “No more unauthorized magic for me.”

  Max laughed. “Obviously. Just keep lookout, okay?”

  “Well, Mother’s already here. She passed us on the way in.”

  “I’m surprised you didn’t ride in with her.”

  Millie clenched her fists. “I am never riding anywhere with her again if I can possibly help it,” she declared.

  Max’s eyebrows shot up. “What happened?”

  So Millie told Max her story again.

  Max sucked in her breath. “That’s... that’s abominable! I can’t believe Mother did that to you!”

  “It’s criminal,” Petunia said. “Abuse. You should persecute her.”

  “Prosecute,” Max corrected.

  “Whatever.”

  “I’ll talk to Baba Luci at the Coven meeting tomorrow,” Millie said, then smacked herself on the forehead. “Oh, no, I’ll have to ride with Mother.”

  “I’ll take you,” Max said. “I think Dad and I are invited on account of being Cretacia’s family.”

  Millie relaxed. “That would be great. Thanks.”

  “There goes another witch,” Petunia sang out.

  Millie glanced up in time to see Aunt Hepsibat fly up to the staircase. She stepped off and gingerly set foot on the stairs, shrinking down to Millie’s size. This gave Millie a fit of giggles.

  “What?” Max said.

  “Teensy Aunt Hepsibat. She’s heading up the stairs,” Millie told him. “Okay, she’s probably far enough that you can go on up to class now.”

  Max popped out of the bush like a frog after a fly, lugging his rolled up carpet and a bulging knapsack. “I can hardly wait for Elementary Potions today,” he said. “I’m going to try making my own liquefied information.”

  Millie looked dubious. “What kind of information?”

  “English!” Max said. “I borrowed some books from Dad. If I can learn English, I can read his notes and identify the location of the Logical Realm portal.”

  Slow respect spread across Petunia’s face. “It’s a good idea. But do you still think Sagara wants us to help her?”

  “Why wouldn’t she?” Millie asked.

  Max glanced at her. “Um, Sagara was not very happy after Thaumaturgy on Foursday. She thinks you charmed her from the beginning.”

  Millie’s stomach lurched. “Oh, no. Do you think I was? I mean, I might have been. What if I charmed all of you?”

  Petunia rolled her eyes. “We’re still here, aren’t we? Quercius dispelled any charms in class, so if we’re here, it must be because we like you anyway, even if you do dress funny.”

  Millie stuck out her tongue at her. “Still, I’m going to have to find a way to make it up to her. But first, I have to go talk to the Headmistress and my mother.”

  They reached the stairs and started up, Millie stopping at Headmistress Pteria’s office. “See you at lunch!” Petunia called to Millie as she and Max continued to their classroom.

  “I’m not allowed to share my lunch with you,” Millie warned.

  Max grinned. “I brought Thai food.”

  Millie burst into laughter. “Perfect!” She waited until they were out of sight around the bend of the stairs, and then she knocked respectfully on the door frame.

  “Come in!” called Headmistress Pteria.

  Millie pushed through the curtain. Bogdana and Aunt Hepsibat sat in one of the chairs, and Thea rested in her pot on the Headmistress’s desk.

  “Welcome, Millie,” said Headmistress Pteria. “I’m sorry to do this to you again, but I’m afraid your mother and your aunt have some deeper discussion to finish. Perhaps we can meet after lunch?”

  Relieved, Millie nodded. “Of course, Headmistress.”

  “Thank you, Millie. You may go.”

  

  It was so hard for Millie to concentrate in class. She tried to talk to Sagara, to apologize and explain, but the elf kept glaring at her and slipping away. Millie fidgeted all through Circle Time, and she stared out the window through most of Reading Group. Fortunately, Master Augustus didn’t push her.

  At last, the gong sounded, and Millie snatched up her cauldron and dashed off to lunch.

  When she got to the table, Petunia was waiting for her, but there was no sign of her brother.

  “Where’s Max?” she asked, setting down her cauldron.

  Petunia twisted the ends of her hair nervously. “He got called to Headmistress Pteria’s office.”

  “Oh, that can’t be good. Aunt Hepsibat must have found out about him.” Millie swallowed hard.

  “Ahem,” said a voice behind her.

  Millie turned to find Sagara looking at her curiously.

  “Sagara!” Millie cried. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know I was charming you, and I didn’t mean to, really.”

  Sagara held up a hand to stop Millie’s babbling. “I know that,” she said.

  “Then, you’re not mad at me?”

  Sagara sighed. “I was at first. I hate it when people mess with me. My brother used to charm me all the time when I was little, made me think I was a bird or a squirrel. It was humiliating.

  “So when I found out you’d charmed me, I was furious. I thought you were just as bad as my brother. Then I saw you in class today, and it was obvious that you were really sorry, which my brother never was. I got to thinking about what, exactly, you charmed me to do. And I realized that your charms just made me feel happy and less lonely. Comforted.”

  Sagara smiled at her. “You don’t charm people to hurt them. You do it to help them, to make them feel better.”

  Millie thought about that. “That’s true. I think that’s why I love cooking so much. Food makes people happy, and I like feeling like I’ve helped them.”

  “Also, yummmmm,” added Petunia.

  “I realized one other thing,” Sagara said. “You were nice to me even before you charmed me, and you were nice to me after, even though you didn’t know I was charmed. You’re my friend, and I’d like to continue being yours. Also, the occasional elfcake wouldn’t hurt.” She winked.

  Millie broke into a big grin. “Then you accept my apology?”

  Sagara lifted her nose, rolled her eyes, and in her old snooty elf voice, said, “Well, I suppose I could do that.” And they all laughed.

  “Now listen,” Sagara said as she sat down. “When I thought I couldn’t rely on Millie doing research for me, I stole my brother’s notes on the portal, and I know how to open it. We have to face a guardian of some kind who will give us three tests. Then we have to say the proper incantation and use a great deal of magical power to open the portal. That’s where your pixie dust will come in handy, Petunia. All we really need is for Max to find the location of the portal, and we can get to the Logical Realm.”

  “I’m in,” Petunia said.

  Millie nodded. “I should be able to help with the guardian, now that I’ve figured out how to charm people.”

  “Don’t overdo it,” Sagara said. “I don’t need the guardian following me through the portal.”

  Millie grimaced. “I’ll do my best.”

  “So when do you think you’ll go?” Petunia asked.

  “That will depend on Max,” Sagara said. She looked worried. “I hope he’ll be okay. I was finally getting used to him and his silly vocabulary. It’d be a shame if he had to leave school now.”

  “MILLIE, PLEASE REPORT TO HEADMISTRESS PTERIA’S OFFICE,” Master Quercius announced.

  Millie’s stomach flipped. “I guess I’m about to fi
nd out.” She put down her cauldron and left the glade, heading up the stairs to the Headmistress’s office. She wasn’t sure, but Millie thought she heard Aunt Hepsibat saying, “But would you consider enrolling Cretacia?” A shiver ran down Millie’s back. Not wanting to hear more, she knocked politely.

  “Enter,” came the dragon’s voice.

  Millie pushed past the curtain and stopped short. In the office were Headmistress Pteria, Bogdana, Hepsibat, and a terrified-looking Max.

  “It has come to our attention,” said Headmistress Pteria, “that your brother Max was enrolled at the Enchanted Forest School under false pretenses.”

  Hepsibat was grinning triumphantly, while Bogdana looked like she was ready to spit nails.

  “Millie,” said the Headmistress, “did you know that Max had forged his entrance papers?”

  Millie considered. She could lie and potentially save herself, but that felt wrong. And there was always the possibility that Headmistress Pteria would simply use another truth spell on her. Besides, she could never lie to her mother.

  “Yes,” Millie said.

  “What?” Bogdana screeched. “And you didn’t tell me?”

  Millie squirmed. “He asked me not to.”

  “I am his mother!” Bogdana stated, standing straight and looking Millie right in the eye, which was a little disconcerting. “I have a right to know information that affects the well-being of my son.”

  “You’re his mother,” Millie said, “but you don’t make decisions for him. His father does that, just as you wouldn’t expect my father to make decisions for me if he were still alive.”

  Hepsibat looked startled and began to say, “Oh, but he’s not dead...” but Bogdana interrupted her.

  “That’s beside the point,” Bogdana said to Millie, glancing sharply at Hepsibat. “Alfonso consults me on Max’s upbringing as a courtesy.”

  Headmistress Pteria broke in. “Councilor Salazar has been notified and will be here shortly.”

  “And how was I supposed to know that?” Millie said. “I thought you’d lost all interest in Max, since we haven’t visited him in five years. Can you really blame him for wanting to enroll? He missed me, and I missed him, and I’m glad he came.”

  “So you lied to me,” Bogdana hissed. “After all your posturing, you’re just as untrustworthy as you accuse me of being.”

  “I did not lie!” Millie insisted. “I told you Max had been giving me rides home from school. You just assumed he wasn’t attending, which is a pretty silly assumption if you ask me.”

  “Treacherous child! Inconsiderate brat!” She rounded on Headmistress Pteria. “And you! You should have informed me as soon as he enrolled.”

  The Headmistress eyed Bogdana coolly. “I had no obligation to do so. Nor would I have informed you had the papers been legitimate, unless Councilor Salazar gave me permission to do so. You are not Max’s legal guardian, and so you have no rights in this matter.”

  A loud knock sounded from the doorway. “Enter!” Headmistress Pteria said.

  Alfonso Salazar strode into the room, a magic carpet tucked under his arm. He looked much the same as he had five years ago, but Millie noticed he had more gray hair at his temples. At the same height as Max, Millie could easily see their similarities, the unkempt brown hair and tan skin, though Salazar had brown eyes.

  “Max!” he said, going over to his son. “Are you all right?”

  Max nodded, not daring to speak.

  “You enrolled yourself in school?”

  Max nodded again.

  “Hmm. And why didn’t you ask me?”

  In a very small voice, Max said, “I didn’t think you’d let me go.”

  Salazar raised an eyebrow. “Why on earth would you think that? I think school is an excellent idea.”

  Max goggled at him. “But, but Hepsibat was going on and on about how awful it was and what a disgrace it was that Millie was going and how she’d never, ever allow Cretacia to attend, and you never said anything. I thought you agreed with her.”

  “Well, that’s what you get for assuming,” Salazar replied. “Hepsibat and I don’t always see eye to eye on things, but I don’t generally argue with her unless I need to.” He winked at Hepsibat, who actually blushed. “Now, tell me why you want to come to this school.”

  “Well, at first, I wanted to come to see Millie,” Max said. “I hadn’t seen her for so long, and I really missed her.” He glared at Bogdana, who turned to glare at Millie again. “I also wanted to get away from Cretacia. She’s horrible, Dad, you have no idea! She tortures me!”

  Salazar rubbed the stubble on his chin. “I used to think you were exaggerating, that this was just some sibling rivalry that the two of you would work out. However, in light of Cretacia’s recent actions, I stand corrected. I’m sorry I didn’t believe you.”

  “But now,” Max said, warming up, “I like it here. I’ve made friends, and I’m learning new things, stuff you haven’t taught me. The school has a great library! And a laboratory, and a thaumaturgy teacher, though he doesn’t like me much right now, and...”

  “All right, all right, breathe already,” said Salazar, laughing. “I get the point.” He turned to the Headmistress. “I am sorry for the confusion, and I apologize for my son’s minor attempt at fraud. But, if you are amenable, I think we can regard this as unusual initiative, rather than criminal intent. I have no objections to Max attending your school.” Millie started to see where Max got his flowery speech from.

  The dragon blinked. “That is acceptable. If you will just sign...”

  “Well, I object!” Bogdana spoke up. “What kind of lesson are you teaching him? That it’s acceptable to commit fraud? To lie to everyone?”

  Salazar suppressed a smile. “Calm down, Danny. There’s no harm here. The lesson I want him to take away from this is that it’s generally easier to ask first.”

  “And you wonder why I haven’t visited in five years! You’re a bad influence, Alfonso.”

  “Now, Danny. Let’s not air our old arguments in public. School has been good for Max, and from what I’ve heard, it’s obviously been good for Millie. Seeing each other every day is probably good for them both.” He sighed. “I wish it had had the same effect on Cretacia.”

  “Oh, don’t you start,” Aunt Hepsibat broke in.

  “No, I won’t,” Alfonso said firmly. “We can do that at home. Headmistress, do you have everything you need from my wife?” From the emphasis he placed on wife, Salazar sounded unhappy with that arrangement.

  “Yes, we are finished for now,” replied the Headmistress.

  Salazar straightened. “Then we will stop taking up your valuable time, won’t we, Hepsibat?”

  Aunt Hepsibat looked like she’d eaten a slug, but she nodded.

  “And as for you, Max,” Salazar said, “get back to class, and I want a full report on everything you’ve done when you get home.”

  Max blinked. “Sure, Dad.”

  “Thank you, Headmistress,” said Salazar, taking Aunt Hepsibat by the elbow and steering her out the door. “Have a good day.”

  The Headmistress turned to Max. “Well, Max, I am disappointed in your methods but pleased with the results. Nonetheless, you will need to return to my office for detention after school today. Understand?”

  Max hung his head. “Yes, Headmistress.”

  “You may go to lunch,” said the dragon.

  “Thank you, Headmistress.” Max winked at Millie as he left.

  Headmistress Pteria heaved a large sigh. “Now, Millie, we finally have time to devote to you. Please take a seat.”

  “Thank you, Headmistress,” Millie said, sitting down.

  “Let’s make this quick,” said Bogdana. “I have a trial to prepare for.”

  “Of course, Councilor,” said the Headmistress. “As I explained in my letter, Millie has manifested an unusual degree of talent in the last few days. She has shown aptitude in charms, transformations, and thaumaturgy, with affinities for both spi
rit magic and kitchen magic.”

  “Excellent,” said Bogdana with satisfaction. “My compliments to you and your staff for helping Millie realize her potential.”

  “You are quite welcome,” Headmistress Pteria told her, drumming her talons on the desk. “However, I have some questions for you. It seems odd to me and to my staff that Millie would have this degree of talent and yet never showed that talent at home. We believe something has been interfering with her magic. Do you have any idea what that could be?”

  Bogdana blinked. “Um, well, not really...”

  “Mother put a binding on our kitchen,” Millie said angrily. “She didn’t want me to be a kitchen witch.”

  “How dare you!” Bogdana protested, rounding on Millie. “Impudent child!”

  Headmistress Pteria leaned forward. “Is this true, Councilor?”

  “None of your business!” Bogdana spat.

  “Ah,” the dragon breathed out. “Then it is true. Don’t you think that was rather severe?”

  Bogdana was turning purple with indignation. “I neither desire nor require your opinion, Pteria. Witches have their own methods and traditions.”

  Headmistress Pteria shook her head. “I have been reading up on traditional witch education and philosophy. I believe bindings are used as either a last resort to control a young witch not yet capable of managing her ability or as a punishment for misuse of magic. Millie falls into neither of these categories.”

  Bogdana stood. “I do not have to justify my actions to you.”

  Headmistress Pteria cocked her head. “No, you don’t, but I do need to know about conditions that affect the potential and well-being of my students.”

  Bogdana glared at the Headmistress. “In that case, I am withdrawing Ludmilla from this miserable institution. I refuse to expose my daughter to such flagrant disrespect!”

  Millie felt like she’d been punched. “No!” she wailed. “I don’t want to leave!”

  Bogdana seized Millie by the arm. “That’s my decision. We are leaving. Now.” She dragged her out of the Headmistress’s office.

  “But what about Thea?” Millie cried, glancing back at the little Dodonas in her pot. “I’m supposed to take care of her.”

  “Not my problem,” Bogdana growled.